About the ask-cndo tag - think of it like our version of r/AskReddit. You ask the CnDO community a question and we answer
My answer:
My cats. I’m always talking about my cats. I know I talk about them too much, and it’s probably annoying the heck out of my coworkers, but I can’t stop. When I catch myself doing it, it’s already past the point of no return. I tell myself “don’t bring up your cats, don’t bring up your cats,” but it keeps happening. Even my instagram is like 99% cat photos.
Well, cats are pretty dam cool @Ducky.
I dont know what I won’t shut up about. Dont seem to have any specific obsesion right now. I could easily just not shut up for hakf an hour, but I’d just jump from topic to topic a liot.
I MAY end up annoying the kidnapper with how much I need the bathroom, though? Like, I need that one a lot right now. That would be VERY inconvenient for a kidnapper.
“Are we there yet? My bladder hurts.” “Oh! A gas station! I wonder if they have a public restroom.” “Hurry, pull over! I’m about to have a baby blowout.” “I need to go again…” “Find somewhere to stop, I’m about to pee my pants”
“Why doeou need the bathroom all the time? It’s really frustrating!”
“Well, then maybe you should not have kidnapped somebody who is effing pregnant! - Now, stop right here, that public toilet will fo in a pinch.”
Yep… that’s about how it would go, more or less. They’d either throw me out ir just shoot me…
The novel Dracula… including my irritation that everybody that makes a movie of it insists on reducing Mina to a pretty McGuffin who exists solely to give the men a reason to be heroic (and don’t even get me started on what Coppola did to her).
Oh, Dracula!
They don’t only tend to play down Mina’s role, they also always do Lucy dirty.
I mean, ok, so she is not as awesone as Mina is (she seems like one of two people to actually have a clue!) , she also is not that nan-crazy flirty thing people like to show her as. - It qnnoys ne so much how either of those cgaradters get treated!
(To be fair, Mina probably would not even MIND, she kind of seems to have this weird thing going on where she thinks she is just helping the men being great and heroic, when she actually is the coolest character in the book!)
Did my kidnappers take Data Structures and Algorithms in school?
Do they know how a linked list works? What about a doubly linked list? Circular linked lists? And the ultimate combo, the circular doubly linked list?
Well, goddamn, they’re gonna learn all about 'em.
And then, oh boy, onward to sorting and why the best time complexity is O(N*logN). That leads us to binary searches, then binary search trees, then directed graphs, and of course undirected graphs, and traversing cyclic vs. acyclic graphs. Recursive functions! The stack! The stack vs. the heap and memory leaks!
They’re either gonna let me go, or they’re gonna barf with boredom and/or bewilderment. I promise them that.
I might have to force it a bit, but I can definately go on a rant about how EA butchered Command & Conquer: Red Alert and what a betrayal the sequel was to the original storyline, and I’ll count the ways. Seriously, I can lay on the nerd rage thick and then go on a tangent how EA in general is the devil’s armpit and how they ruined great studios and franchises. Or I can branch out into geopolitics. Give them armchair general’s assesments of Russia’s predicament, US failures in the Middle East, explain how Charles De Gaulle did nothing wrong, or break out the heavy artillery with unsollicited opinions on Israel, because that never remains a civil discussion.
Well, hm. Could be a number of topics, perhaps, but… proooobably something train-related? 
For instance, interesting fact that even I myself only learned relatively recently (while looking for a source to show someone that there really was a period when passenger cars had concrete floors): did you know that there was a period when it was common for passenger cars to have wheels largely made out of paper? I am completely serious, and it made sense at the time.
I’d talk about my basement renovation plans and I’d complain a lot about the cost of materials these days. From there I can see launching into even more mundane conversation.
As for you Winston, I don’t think you’ll be found on the road alive.
I have encyclopedic knowledge of all sorts of things no one could care less about. Which I’m sure I’ve already demonstrated here.
But lets pick one. The reasons I believe Farscape is one of the best scifi series to come out in the last 20 years.
My initial thought was “probably the Fourth Amendment” but then I realized that would be giving them advice.
Uh… I could go on for a while about how much of a dumpster fire the run-up to World War I was, I guess.
Probably some combination of insane theories about various semi-obscure cartoons and the band The Mountain Goats.
About how hot Mads Mikkelsen is in the new Fantastic Beasts film and how he makes cannibalism look delicious in Hannibal.
Maths. Just maths.
@ThatGuyLight you’d just start rattling off the names of random actors and list every movie they’ve been in lol
Well, right now I’m watching Castaway. I remember seeing this in the theater and already knew Tom Hanks for Forest Gump and of course Toy Story. Turner and Hooch was also a childhood classic. I saw Bachelor Party at too young an age but hey, yolo. Apollo 13 was required viewing in school, especially when we’d visit the Christa Mcauliffe Museum, rest her soul. Road to Perdition might be his most mature role considering he plays a gangster who isn’t…GASP…a nice guy, as he’s accustomed to playing in such movies like The Green Mile A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood The Polar Express Catch Me if You Can You’ve Got Mail Toy Story 2 Toy Story 3 Toy Story 4 Saving Private Ryan
What? No reference to Splash?
Vintage telephones. Did you know the first video phone call was made at the 1964 World’s Fair to Disneyland? The fair also featured the then new touch tone dialing system as a futuristic more convenient alternative to the standard rotary dial that had been in use for decades. Speaking of rotary dials, the best dial is the Western Electric #5 dial is the most satisfying rotary dial ever made. It has a very mechanical action with a very loud “clacky” sound on the return. This is in stark contrast to the smooth, more “buzzy” action of the Automatic Electric dials. The fingerstop on the Western Electric is also more conveniently placed at the 3 o’clock position rather than 5 o’clock position, allowing for less travel around the dial for faster more precise dialing. The dial center is also much easier to remove on the Western, making changing dial cards a breeze for when you need to update your number from the old alphanumeric system to the numeral only number format.